| Competing
Coconut Countries - In A Nutshell |
| Isn't this a heavenly place to live in ! The kampong folks here in Pahang would certainly think us 'silly urban nuts' for putting 'nutty' signs like these in East Coast Park, Singapore! |
| However,
the word is out ! Singapore is clearly not the runaway winner of the
universal 'Nuttiest Award' yet. The contention is pitching a feverish
all-time high right now. Malaysian urbanites have put their kepalas together and have come up with one cracking extravagance that not only stands out in the day but goes 'blink-blink-aglow' at night too ! |
 |
| The urban
planners and civil authorities are clearly not alone. Standing firmly
behind are clever engineers issuing a brilliant challenge that seemed
to glare down like the North Star with no uncertain terms. No doubt,
the best of 'gotong royong' is at work here. Their partying slogans
- 'Teknologi Bagus' and 'Malaysia Boleh' - could be heard far and
wide with their emphatic 'LAH', of course ! The small Red Dot, as expected, became red-hot under the collar. After all, has not Singapore the 'best schools', 'best brains', 'best rules', 'best signs', etc? Verily, the 'bestest' engineers gathered and plotted under their iconic Merlion. Inspirations spewed out over the Singapore River faster than the Merlion's spit. Witness the ultimate contraption - CoCoNET ! But alas ! Disappointment could not come sooner. Before they could even shout 'Eureka!', a loud chorus of 'Alamak!' can be heard all the way in Malaysia. The contention for the universal 'Nuttiest Award' goes to a singlet-clad old Chinese towkay selling plants in a quiet kampong over there. He has created for 2005's Chinese New Year festivity a good-luck plant cleverly called the 'Gong Xi Fa Cai Golden Nut-get'. Shoppers are delirious over it. |
|
Epilogue
|
| The verdict
is still out there though. At the present moment, the old towkay has
a head above the rest for the 'Nuttiest Award' , and not that he cared.
He is contented with the sales of his "Golden Nut-gets".
At RM$30 each, they are selling like hot-cakes and he is smiling all
the way to the bank. Kudos to the man who triumphs over his meagre
primary school education with admirable resourcefulness and enterpreneurship. As for the competing engineers, academics and high-powered bureaucrats, they have to swallow their pride. Innovation, the wise have discovered, does not necessary stem from learning, or vice versa. Some unconsolable souls were last seen kicking coconuts into the sea out of spite. And the nuts - as do tens of thousands do each day - they gratefully float away with the tide to challenge people like the good towkay across the globe with their one thousand and one, or more, uses. And last but not least, I heard that the politicians are studying the 'Nuttiest Award' closely. They are seriously considering using it to revise strategies for friendly bi-lateral engagements with neigbouring countries. In a nutshell, it is better to laugh at each other openly and congenially than to 'hurl coconuts' at each other. Macam hurtful lah! |
A
short dictionary of vernacular words / names
used in the essay above (abbreviation: M - in Malay)
kampong - village (M), Pahang - a state in Malaysia, kepala
- head (M), gotong royong - communal cooperation / help (M), Teknologi
Bagus - Technology Good (M), Boleh - can, able (M),
lah - a common tail-end word of emphasis (M), Red Dot -
reference to Singapore, Merlion - a half-lion-half-fish water-spewing
icon in Singapore, alamak - a common exclamation of surprise (M),
towkay - boss (M), Gong Xi Fa Cai - 'wishing you happiness and
prosperity' in Chinese, RM - Malaysian Ringgit (M) or dollar, Macam
- like (M).